In my world, there would be a place for me to always be free.
In my world, there would be a place to escape my frustration easily.
In my world, a woman could be who God designed her to be.
In my world, my faith would be as vast as the deep blue sea.
In my world, hope of a young girl would grow like branches on a tree.
In my world, a black man can be all he was meant to be without fear of brutality.
In my world, sisters and brothers are bound by loyalty.
In my world, we love one another fiercely.
In my world, a respected trait is honesty.
But in my world of creativity, the words cruelty and envy there could never be. BUT, that my friends, wouldn’t be REALITY…
If I left the world today I would want to share the last threads of my fibers with you. Praying that they resonate with at least one or two. We often give up the opportunity to speak our minds because of how it might affect others but if we were leaving this earth today, would it even matter? Well, just in case, here are my sentiments: Learn to love as God has directed us to, anytime I chose to love or even live contrary to his word, it never worked out. Stop fooling yourselves, no one is perfect, but that does not remove the need to strive for perfection. Our imperfections should drive us to do better, not serve as a crutch for complacency. Acceptance – it is the gateway for rebuilding. You can not rebuild or even correct something that you refuse to admit is broken. We fear rejection and when we admit our faults the fear that we will be rejected based on those faults are overwhelming, but please understand that anyone who truly loves you and was sent to you by God is there to rebuild with you, not reject you. So accept their exit or absence as God’s removal from your life and NOT their rejection of you.
Spend some time truly learning about sacrifice. Some of us pretend to have sacrificed but have no clue what it is. To me, sacrifice is giving up something or someone that takes us beyond the extent of comfort. To be perfectly clear, when I mention sacrifice, it is a conversation that comes directly from first hand giving up my last morsel of food, not for one meal, but for days at a time, until my body succumbed to the effects of starvation. It was then and only then, when my head was hurting, my mouth was dry, my stomach and body were cramping, and I lacked the strength to stand, did I know what real sacrifice meant. Not every situation in life will require that level of sacrifice and that is ok, but let’s call that what it is – simply doing what must be done.
Be true to what is right. Do not confuse love or loyalty with doing the right thing. You can love yourself, your partner and anyone you enter into a relationship, but doing the wrong thing in the name of love is wrong, and, in my opinion, not love at all. Similarly, do not settle or accept less than the right thing from your loved ones. I have been fooled in the past about this one. You can love someone despite their flaws but if you love them you will not leave them to their sinfully syndicated flaws. Pray for them, forgive them, and help them overcome.
I have lived a life in the sum of 40 years but often because I chose to ignore God’s messages the days of misery passed like 40 years a piece. I have no more time for excuses, I have no more time for avoidance, I have no more time for selfish sin, I have no more time for complacency, I have no more time to surrender to failure, I simply have no more time for I leave this earth today…
She is fragile, but her fight runs deep, so deep she doesnt know when it’s saving her or hurting her. An inner strength so fiery it must hurt her in order to save her. She fights everyday but Mediocrity and strife are very persistent, will she remain consistent or give in to life. A fire burns inside of her, the flame is seen thru her eyes yet they still yurn to touch her. She sees the fear, the judgment in their eyes when they stare, when will they notice it’s a plea for help-like a safety flare. Sadly they ignore it and their encounter ends with a glare. Her strength is viewed as anger, her faith as madness, and her fear as sadness. But she keeps moving, for God has given her another day and his word is assurance that all will be okay and through his grace she will find a way…
We are often searching for the things that we desire in the absolutely wrong places. But then we have the temerity to complain about the results or the product we end up with. We go to the drug store when we want to lose weight, we stop at the convenience store for dog food, and so on. To that end, we continue the charade by not realizing that our desire for a quick fix, for convenience often costs us more in the end. To further perpetuate our bad choices, if we go to the drug store and buy a product and the product does not work as it was advertised, we spare no cost in returning it and demanding a refund or replacement. However, when we go to the strip club and find a mate, male or female, and they are not who they purport to be, we hold onto them, accept their inconsistency and fool ourselves into thinking we can change them. Rarely do we ever find ourselves returning that person to the strip club where we found them. So whether you remain in a relationship with this person for 6 days, 6 weeks, or 6 months, the return policy remains the same. Ask yourself this, if you go to the store and purchase an item, bring it home, and then break it or find that it is broken already and you have thrown out the receipt, what do you do with the product? Do you keep it in a closet, going back to check to now again whether it has repaired itself? Of course you do not because you know that this is not possible. However, when we find someone and once we get them home, find out that they are broken, we try and try and try to fix and/or change them. Now, obviously you cannot handle a person exactly like you would a broken object. But the principle is similar. You can hope for the best, but you must realize that a person’s will to change comes from God and their desire to change. You do not have to desert a person to know that they are not necessarily for you. I spent several years in an abusive relationship, not only out of fear, but out of fooling myself that I could change the person. I could not change him, and I could not save him and myself at the same time. But what I could do was pray for both him and me. My prayer for him would be that he was freed from the clutches of whatever demons or circumstances made him the way he was; the prayer for myself was that I was freed of the demons keeping him in my life.
What I am trying to say is that you are not a bad person for deciding to return a something or someone that is not designed for you. But continuing to convince yourself that you can do something that was not in God’s will for you only prolongs receipt of what you sought in the first place.
It is time we claim only what God has placed on the shelves for us. If you are a singer, you would not buy a nail and hammer to complete your purpose. You would purchase what was designed to aid you in progress and not hinder your forward movement. So recognize that the same holds true for relationships and other facets of life. Do not be fooled by false advertisement, not everything is for you.